You will achieve a Hot Break after you add your extracts when it looks like it may boil over and gets really foamy. I have seen wort hot break with that addition of hops as well. the better the hot break the better your brew will be. for a 5 gallon batch full wort boil (starting with about 6.5 - 7 gallons of water) i used a 15 gallon stainless keg on a turkey fryer and could get a hot break that would overflow the pot if i wasn't careful and would last about 5 - 10 minutes. and it would break everytime i added hops which is a good indication of the chemical reactions.

The cold break is when the proteins, starches and other compounds are visibling sinking to the bottom of your fermenter. The better your cold break the better your yeast will do generally. I strongly recommend a a wort chiller because the faster you can get your wort to pitching temperature the better your cold break will be.

Also, make sure you are getting proper carbonation and your sanitation is top notch. After that just practice practice and practice more! if you find a brew club in your area or within driving distance, check them out. If you can find a brew on premise place, check them out as well. Their brewers will be able to sample your beer and give you a really good guess on what may be going wrong. If/when you decide to take the plunge... all grain will give you unbelievable results, however the time involved per batch will go up exponentially.